Copy of Davie's Corner

I was hurt to the core and completely at a loss to understand how this “beginner” could be paid more for any reason. I began to feel nauseous as if I had consumed bad food.

In that air conditioned office, I started to sweat and my heart was beating fast like a Gene Krupa solo. Confusion began to interact unfavorably with anger and ignorance. I was starting to “wild out” as my mind began to visualize a word that made the situation even more difficult to deal with. That word began moving clockwise through my head as if being scrolled across a huge movie screen. Like those newsreel depictions of the Times Square building that announced the surrender of Japan in 1945, the letters glowed in my mind. The “R” word developed in my mind like a Polaroid picture. It became clear to me that I was a victim of “R-R-R-A”. It’s even hard to say now. Like the dandelions emerging on my lawn during early spring, it was plain to see. There was no other reasonable explanation. RACISM had bitten me on the butt and its venom was spreading through me like a California forest fire.

I needed an explanation, an answer. Somebody’s got to tell me somethin’! The only person who could quench my thirst for understanding was “Mr. S”, the manager. I couldn’t talk to him or even look at him that day as I was really pissed off folks. I was unable to keep my cool or be objective enough to engage in discussion; Not that day. Like Scarlet O’Hara said, “Tomorrow is another day”. I thought of nothing else for the remainder of that day and evening. The next day took forever to come and I had too much time to think. I accused myself of having been naïve and the penalty manifested itself in serious anxiety. I knew that had my eyes been open and my head not positioned up you know where, I should have seen the forest before the trees fell on me.

Historically, prior to my promotion to the supervisory position, there had never been a Black claim supervisor in that office, or for that matter, anywhere in the company. I had been a field investigator who, at management’s behest, was suddenly ball and chained to daily desk duty for almost a year. That was definitely unusual and a clue that went completely over my head. It was like the classic subterfuge that Tom Sawyer used on his friends, charging them a fee for the “privilege” of painting his aunt’s fence. I had the full responsibility of a supervisor but no title or commensurate pay increase. Hey, why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free? It escaped me entirely. I was just a “happy darkie” workin’ like a slave! (Can you say “Doo-Dah”?)

I wasn’t given the actual promotion until management had an opportunity to look me over at home office. There I met all of the bigwigs and they spent an entire day trying to pick me apart. The only thing that they didn’t do was to check my teeth, gums and genitals before putting me on the auction block. That’s just how I felt. The evidence was clear and unmistakable just as sure as black is dark and not considered a color. I had earned two college degrees and was in the process of working on a third. I had ten years of intense industry experience, which was the reason that I was selected to handle the most difficult claim department desk position in the system.

RUDE AWAKENING

Probably because of the ongoing presidential election process, lately, my attention has been focused on prejudice and race. My inaugural online article, “Golfing While Black” and the HTQ summer issue article, “Pride & Prejudice 2008”, share similar themes, although unintended. Again, I am drawn to these related subjects because of a chance meeting with Richard Kenyada. He and I attended the same junior high school and have mutual friends from way back when, but had never met. He is the author of “Essays and Open Wounds While Waiting for the Apology”. We talked for quite some time after a recent school reunion. Richard was kind enough to give me an autographed copy of his book, which I read in one sitting. It was that compelling and triggered something in me.

In college, electively, I had been exposed to the work of William Baldwin (The Fire Next Time), Eldridge Cleaver (Soul on Ice) and William Knaulls, (Black like Me). Dr. Cornel West’s work, “Race Matters”, ignites one’s sense of reality as concerns racial interactions, no matter which side of the spectrum you find yourself on.¬¬¬

Kenyada’s book sets forth perspectives surrounding the American government’s need to offer an Apology to African Americans. Their ancestors were abducted into involuntary servitude and brought here to ultimately build this country. He effectively tells it like it is relative to prejudice/race through views and opinions involving inflammatory life experiences.

In July 2008, thanks to the more than decade long efforts of Steve Cohen (D) Tenn., the House of Representatives “authorized” the issuance of an Apology to Black Americans for slavery and “Jim Crow” practices. And, it only took several lifetimes for the issue to be formally confronted! All of the above influences, Kenyada’s being most recent, inspired me to address the issues again through the following personal experience.

During my tenure as an employee of a well known insurance company, I became aware of a fact that initiated the major changes in the course of my life. Simply put, my employer allowed an inequity to prevail that opened my eyes, big time. The perceived reason for the inequity was a factor that remains a controlling influence in American society. It definitively threatens to be the deciding factor as to who will occupy the Oval Office in January 2009.

One day in May of 1972, the paycheck for the fresh out of college, supervisor trainee, who sat behind me, was placed on my desk by mistake. Not paying any particular attention to the envelope, I opened it as I thought that it was mine. Matter of factly, I scanned the information on the envelope contents and noted a difference in the “digits”. Then the name on the check caught my eye. Like a jolt from a Muhammad Ali jab, I was floored, stunned and amazed. While down on the mental canvass, I remember saying to myself, “Oh sh_ _, this young (white) dude is making more money than me!!!

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Discussion with Mr. S took place at 7:00 a.m. the following morning. I went in early to meet with him because he started before everyone else. The combination of nerves, anticipation and anger was difficult to gain control over. Breathing was labored as I walked the “last mile” to his office. The ensuing conversation went something like this:

“Good morning, Mr. S.

Good morning Dave. My, you’re early this morning!

Well yes, sir. Frankly, there is a problem that I need to talk to you about. I thought it best to discuss it with you privately.

Of course Dave, have a seat.

(I took a seat in one of the two chairs positioned in front of his huge walnut desk while Mr. S finished writing some notes. He then sat upright giving me his full attention.)

(Hesitation) Sir, it has come to my attention that the new fellow, an inexperienced trainee, who is starting as a supervisor trainee, a position that I had to earn over a period of time, is making more money than I am. I don’t know how this can be and I thought it best to discuss it with you to get your input before jumping to any conclusions.

(Seemingly surprised, with furrowed brow) Are you sure of this Dave?

Yes sir, I’m afraid that it’s irrefutable and I would have to think that it is not necessarily unknown to you. You hired him, right?

Well yes Dave, I did, but...”

It was then that a crimson red, embarrassed look began to overtake his persona. He began a “homina, homina, homina” stuttering response that simulated Jackie Gleason’s, Ralph Cramden character. You know the one that Ralph descends to when Alice catches him in a compromised position?

“Well Dave, I have a big office to run and it isn’t always possible to keep up with every

small detail!

Well sir, I don’t think that paying your lead supervisor less than a trainee should be considered a small thing. Especially when you consider that I am training him and he sits behind me! Wouldn’t it be anticipated that information like this might be shared during even casual conversation?

Well Dave, (homina, homina, homina)! etc. Sometimes things just fall through the cracks.

Sir, I have never known you to allow things to fall through cracks or for cracks to even exist!” (GOTCHA).

Sparing you further details, he offered to “look into this”. A week later, I was told, “Dave, we will make a salary adjustment when your anniversary comes up next year. Bear with us”. I guess that I wasn’t worth any immediate additional consideration. You name a bad feeling and I felt it. A rude awakening occurred. I was a victim of textbook, institutionalized racism/prejudice and I felt stupid for not detecting it sooner. Forthwith, my search for a new job began. As a direct result of having my eyes opened, I busted moves like Michael Jackson. Within five years, I moon walked my way from being a lower level supervisor to the position of divisional Vice-President for a Park Avenue corporation. Within eleven years, I became the CEO/President of my own corporation.

Race is only one of several prejudices that serve as a negative conditioning element and an “impediment to betterment”. However, it is becoming more difficult to perceive injustices and degrading situations. Too many of us have bought into believing that “things are getting better”. It is true that relatively speaking, advancement is obvious.

The government will (probably) never again round up Japanese citizens for internment like they did during WWII. The likelihood of Black people being lynched (from trees that is) has been minimalized. And, all people can legally drink from the same public water fountains. However, prejudice and race relations are transitionally still in the early innings of what appears to be an extremely long game.

According to Hispanic Advocates Association, Inc., prognostications are that by 2050, Hispanics will represent thirty percent of our population. As such, they will become the most populous ethnic group in America. Despite this fact, barriers to their equality are firmly entrenched. Their second class citizenship is almost guaranteed as there is little in place to certify their assimilation and acceptance. For the most part, Hispanics have been treated as a value added commodity; a necessary evil. No matter how big they get, a beached whale cannot survive without intervention, divine or otherwise.

Women still teeter on the edge of being told what they can or cannot do with their bodies due to the threat of Roe v. Wade reversal. The things that held us at bey in the past will manifest in more subtle but equally infuriating and crippling ways. In the workplace, job opportunities and promotions will continue to be denied to the worthy. Ever hear of the “glass ceiling”? Access to club memberships will be denied “for cause”. At restaurants and public accommodations, less favorable seating will be meted out to some of “us”. Have you ever been seated at a table located in an obscure corner or proximate to a heavily traveled service/rest room area? Did you wonder why when the restaurant was damn near empty? How about being served last (or not at all) at a table of eight when you are the (soul) minority figure at the table? I’m a witness, baby!

Catching a cab in a metropolitan area is easy for some but not for others. Just ask actor Danny Glover what the criteria might be. “Brother” Glover found out one evening on a busy New York City street. Yellow cabs would not stop for this famous man and his rancor resulted in legislation that addressed this specific problem. When I am with Caucasian family, friends or associates, I suggest that “they” hail the cab so that we can get where we wish to go “today”. We laugh it away but it’s the same ole’, same ole!!

People are only human and as such have agendas; a fact of life. In our society, those who are on top usually get their way. Those who occupy the bottom rungs are at risk of being subjected to various prejudices and abuses. Terms such as weak, easy, pushover, fool, sucker, lazy, follower, uneducated, silly, stupid (and many others), spark prejudicial exposures. If any of these terms apply to you for any reason, then the possibility is great that you are vulnerable. It is probable that you are exposed to and effected by classic unperceived prejudices. This will only change when we, as individuals, wake up. Never allow anyone or any situation to siphon your energy or strengths, be they financial, emotional or otherwise. By example, if someone has the nerve to ask you for a loan, have the intestinal fortitude to say, “No”.

Financial Guru, Suze Orman has become a favorite in my world. She calls a club a club. (No more “spade” analogies). We tend to be fall guys for loved ones (and other con artists) when we give in to their persistence and pressure, especially as concerns $$$$$. Suze recommends that you respond by saying,”I love you too much to lend you money”. Have you ever heard of that one before? I hadn’t either but her position hits home and is actually bible based. “Give a man a fish and he’ll eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he’ll eat for a lifetime” In other words, it is not always good to be a helping hand. People need to fend out for themselves. The good book does say, “The Lord helps those…”

Usually, people are not intentionally harmful. But, whether one steps on your foot on purpose or by accident, it still hurts!! Avoid the pain. Race/Racism and prejudice will maintain an ominous and painful presence, breathing heated halitosis for the foreseeable future. Race/Racism may not effect you per se, but, prejudice of some sort is always lurking and waiting to strike. Wake up and smell the coffee, tea or whatever! Those who are on top count on complacency to keep the lower rungs occupied. “Seek and ye shall find”. In the words of Mahatma Gandhi, “Be that which you wish to see”.

The yellow brick road does not always lead back to Kansas like in the movie. Remember, Dorothy (and let’s not forget Toto) had plenty of help getting to her destination but only after significant effort on her part. Unfortunately, I feel that the way things have been, if Dorothy had been a person of color, both she and her “little dog too” would still be trying to find a way home! However, in this country, despite the inequalities, you can grab a brass ring from life’s Merry-Go-Round. You may have to reach for it but, it’s there waiting for you to take hold; trust me.

Headlights are positioned on the front of cars so that you can see where you are going when it gets dark. It’s up to you when to turn the lights on. In nature, nurturing takes place for a period of time and then you’re on your own. And that is really what this session is all about. Hopefully, a rude awakening will not have to be the motivation that precipitates your metamorphosis.

© 2010 Harlem Torch Magazine, LLC